How To Best Prepare For Your First Silent Retreat (Personal Experiences)

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Now begins “Noble Silence.” 

These words uttered right after dinner, were the kick-off to our 10-day silent retreat in Malaysia.

Over the following days, we were each going to dive within. 

To detach from all distractions and get in touch with oneself spiritually, mentally, and physically. 

This 10-day journey was a life-altering experience. If you are considering and wondering how to prepare for a silent retreat, keep reading.

We share our tips and personal experiences, including what to bring on a silent retreat.

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What is A Silent Retreat?

MeditationCenter and Silent Retreat center by Authentic Food Quest
Meditation hall at the center in Malaysia

Silent meditation retreats involve a structured routine of meditation sessions, daily tasks, and spending time with yourself in complete silence.

No distractions, no electronic devices, just the solitude of being alone.

Of the many different types of silent retreats, we chose a 10-day Vipassana retreat in Malaysia

We were attracted to the approach, which is a non-sectarian technique. Anyone of any religious belief or practice can attend. 

While it is rooted in the teachings of the Buddha, you are encouraged to question your experience. The idea is to make your own decisions based on how you feel and not simply accept what you are told.

On a personal level, we went on a silent retreat out of curiosity, a desire for a transformational experience, and for a digital detox.

As digital nomads working on the road 24/7, the opportunity to take a “break,” “reflect,” and “listen within” was something we were ready for. 

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What to Bring For Your Meditation Retreat

Planning for comfort is key in a silent meditation retreat. With a focus on meditation, you don’t want to be distracted by the wrong or ill-fitting clothes.

Here’s how we packed and what we recommend taking on your 10-day silent retreat.

Clothes Packing List

Rosemary_SilentRetreat_AuthenticFoodQuest
Rosemary in her comfy meditation pants

After signing up for our silent meditation retreat, we received several emails with tips for what to bring and how to prepare. 

The “dress code” warned against bringing shorts, tank tops, transparent, tight, or revealing clothing.

Needless to say, you’ll not need much. After all, the main activity for the 10-day period is sitting cross-legged and meditating.

We suggest to pack comfortable clothes like:

  • Meditation pants: These are loose-fitting and stretchy pants made with breathable material.
  • Shawl: You’ll be grateful to have a sweater or shawl for early morning and evening meditation sessions.
  • Cozy socks: We were glad to have packed warm socks, especially for the morning meditation sessions. We highly recommend having at least two pairs of comfy socks.
  • Flip-Flops:  These are handy for the bathrooms and also to wear in and out of the meditation center.

Toiletries

Inside Dormitory Silent Rretreat by Authentic Food Quest
You’ll need only a few essentials

Here are a few additional practical items to help ensure a smooth stay.

  • Personal toilet paper: Even though there was toilet paper available, we were glad to each have had our own personal stash for the just in case moments.
  • Toiletry bag: Keep your bathroom necessities in a bag that you can hang in the bathroom and keep conveniently next to your bed.
  • Dry shampoo: In a shared women’s bathroom, hot water was at a premium, especially for washing hair. Having dry shampoo can be helpful for a 10-day period.

Washing Clothes

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Our quick-dry towels so helpful in many occasions

Daily life at the retreat consists of meditation practices separated by breaks for food and personal tasks, such as laundry. It’s helpful to bring the following:

  • Travel sheets: for an extra layer of comfort for your dormitory bed.
  • Quick-dry towel: with not a lot of room to hang or dry clothes, it was convenient to have a towel that could dry quickly after taking a shower.

Technology

Technology Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
Focus on the meditation

It is advised to keep electronic devices and writing material to a minimum. They are not allowed during silent retreats. 

At registration, our journals and mobile phones were taken away and kept in secure storage until the end of the retreat.

It is not worth trying to sneak anything in. Allow yourself to be fully present and take the precious time to focus on the teachings and the meditation.

Other Necessities

  • Water bottle: It’s handy to have a water bottle to easily drink between breaks in meditation and at night. We used our Grayl water bottles in Southeast Asia, where we could purify the water conveniently on the go.
  • Ear plugs: I can sleep through anything, but Claire found it helpful to have earplugs.
  • Headlamp: to see in the dark when going to the bathroom or to light the way for  early morning meditations
  • Journal: once the silent retreat ends, have a journal to record your experience when it is still fresh in your mind. 

Mental Preparation For 10 Day Silent Retreat

Dormitory Building for Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
The female only dormitory

We were both nervous about our 10-day silent retreat and what to expect. The Penang Hill East Center was small and simple. 

Men and women were separated, and our female-only dormitory was filled to capacity with about sixteen women.

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Our Concerns Going To The Silent Retreat

Entrance Dormitory Silent Rretreat Authentic Food Quest
Be focus to focus on yourself

Generally, it is not recommended to go on silent meditation retreats with your loved one or with friends. 

The goal is to minimize all distractions and allow you to focus on yourself. Despite the warning, we signed up together.

Not being able to talk to each other or look at each other in a confined space added to the difficulty of remaining in complete silence for 10 days. 

Claire was worried about the experience. Often asking, “Am I going to turn crazy?” “Am I going to feel claustrophobic from not being able to move around much?”

Rosemary was most concerned about the dormitory living. What would it be like with 16 strangers? “Would it be clean? Would we be able to sleep? Would the shared bathrooms be clean?”

The food was a joint concern. What would the food be like? Would it be good? Would it be enough? 

We knew ahead of time that there would be only two full meals a day and that they would be vegetarian.

Helpful Tips For a Silent Retreat

Group For Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Our amazing group

Retreat centers are designed to accommodate new and experienced meditators. Everything you need is available to you.

Our dormitory was clean, and we didn’t feel claustrophobic or confined.

We found it best to have a mantra to turn to if you struggle and to remind yourself why you are doing this. 

It’s important to remember that the goal is to spend time with oneself, practicing mindfulness. 

You want to experience the calm and connection that comes with complete silence and meditation practices.

The best way to prepare for a silent retreat is to let go of pre-existing expectations and go in with an open mind.

READ MORE: Food Travel Near And Far: 10 Tips To Become A Great Food Traveler

Our Experience On The 10-Day Silent Meditation Retreat

Vipassana Timetable and Schedule

Timetable at the Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
The strict daily schedule

Right from the start, you are thrown off track. The schedule is quite simple and very strict. 

The wake-up time is 4:00 am, so you are ready for silent meditation at 4:30 am, way before sunrise.

Most of the day is dedicated to meditating, though there are periodic breaks to eat, shower, rest, and do laundry. 

The day finishes at 9:00 pm, and by 9:30 pm, the lights are turned off. The expectation is that you should be in bed by then.

Quickly, your mind, body, and soul adjust to this new routine. You figure out when to take your shower when to eat, and when to do your laundry. 

You create new habits over the 10-day silent retreat.

Vipassana Food Menu

Vipassana Food Menu Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
Vegetarian dishes with rich flavors

As culinary explorers, we probably obsessed too much about the meals. 

For us, food was an anchor point, and the meals were milestones to look forward to.

With Penang being the food capital of Malaysia, we knew we would not be disappointed by the options. 

In fact, we were impressed with the rich flavors and generous portions. 

The diet was entirely vegetarian, made up of noodle soups, grains, rice, and tofu dishes.

To drink, we enjoyed delicious fresh fruits and teas with lemongrass and ginger spices.

Breakfast and lunch were very similar, resembling a full meal. One of the biggest adjustments one needs to make is to be prepared to eat noodles at 6:30 am. 

The final light refreshment was served at 5:00 pm, and it was limited to light drinks, like tea and a fruit.

We are extremely grateful to the wonderful volunteers who cooked such delicious meals for 10 continuous days. 

The creativity in the meals and diverse flavors helped make the experience easier. 

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What It’s Like? 10 Hours of Daily Meditation

The Vipassana Technique

Meditation Room at the Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Inside the meditation hall where we spent most of our time

The word “Vipassana” means seeing things as they really are. It is the process of self-purification by self-observation. 

You begin by observing the natural breath to concentrate the mind. 

You move your attention systematically from head to feet and from feet to head, “scanning” every part of your body and feeling all the sensations you come across.

In theory, this may not sound difficult, but in practice, it can be one of the hardest things you’ve ever done. 

For 10 hours a day, you go through this process while attempting to stay “equanimous.” That is the ability not to “react” to the sensations you are observing.

So while your knees, hips, and back may be crying out in physical pain, the idea is to observe the pain and not get attached to it. This is a fundamental teaching of Vipassana.

AUTHENTIC FOOD QUEST TIP: To learn more about Vipassana, check out the book The Art of Living: Vipassana Meditation by William Hart

Adjusting to the Process

Vipassana Settings Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Accept the experience

The process evolves over the 10-day period. The daily meditation practice doesn’t get easier, but it gets more manageable

For example, it took me until day six to finally complete my first sitting of “strong determination”:

Sitting completely still, with your eyes closed, for one hour. 

One of the best pieces of advice we got from a friend before the retreat was “to go into it with no expectations. To enjoy it and to surrender ourselves to the experience”.

While it was not easy, it became clear over the 10-day period that the experience was the journey of a lifetime. 

Each day brought new challenges, new aches and pains. But the central question remained the same, “can I, at this moment, let go and not be attached to the sensations? 

To realize the impermanent nature of things.”

Evening Discourses

Evening Discourses How To Prepare For A Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Evening view on the city of Penang

The context for the daily meditations was put in focus with evening discourses from S.N. Goenka. 

Born in Myanmar or Burma, Goenka trained under Sayagyi U Ba Khin, a leading authority on Vipassana meditation.

Goenka is best known for spreading Vipassana and building centers all around the world.

The wisdom and inspiration Goenka shared each evening was something we looked forward to. 

Using stories and parables told with his wicked sense of humor, he helped us examine the realities of our own bodies and minds.

Silent Meditation

Meditation Room Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Private space for meditating

While most of the meditations took place in the main hall, there were opportunities during the day to meditate in your room or private space instead. 

This was a welcome relief and a chance to stretch and move a little more. The biggest danger of meditating in your room or private space was fighting sleep.

Towards the end, we began to crave the daily meditations. We wanted to take advantage of being able to meditate in a supportive environment, uninterrupted for many hours. 

It was a feeling of wanting to seize the moment, as life rarely gives you 10 uninterrupted days to focus solely on you.

Our Key Takeaways From The Silent Retreat

Dormitory Area How To Prepare For A Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
Dormitory territory

For each and every participant, the experience was unique and deeply personal. We both got more out of the silent retreat than words can express. Overall, the experience was life-changing.  

The realization that the journey is a life journey and a daily practice. The ability to “feel” and “sense” rather than intellectualize was like seeing the world anew.

Below we share some of our own personal reflections.

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Claire’s Experience on the Meditation Retreat

Claire Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
Happy Claire after her silent jorney

This experience really helped me to distance myself from my anger and frustrations and to observe them. And then, let them pass through. 

Most importantly, I learned an invaluable technique that can help me every day. As anger and frustration arise, I know how to work on myself and manage my own thoughts and reactions. 

Instead of trying to find contentment in external factors, I know that I need to work on a daily basis to find peace within myself. The experience is definitely a lifelong learning and a practice that I cherish. As an ex-French national athlete, I find the experience similar to any sport. You’ve got to practice to get better at it. It has to become a part of your daily routine.

Rosemary’s Experience on The Meditation Retreat

Rosemary Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Rosemary at her private room

In short, Vipassana brought me in touch with my inner self. The experience brought me closer to my feelings. 

The body scan approach and realizing that all the knots and pains were bunched up emotions was enlightening. Being able to breathe through them and let them go, with no attachments and judgment, was a freeing and powerful feeling. 

Most importantly, I learned a tool and technique that I can apply for life. That said, it is a journey of a lifetime and not just an experience to have. I felt free, light, and joyful from within. 

Knowing that I have the ability to sit still and breathe through any situation is empowering. However, it is work that needs focus and dedication.

Silent Retreat as a Couple

Bangkok Center Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
At a meditation center in Bangkok

Even though we were nervous at first about taking the retreat together as a couple, it ended up being okay. 

We did not try to make contact with each other over the 10-day period and instead gave each other space to be fully present. Looking back, we are glad to have shared this experience together. 

We now have a common language and practice that we have been able to incorporate into our lives. This strengthened and added a new dimension to our relationship.

Here is our tip for couples thinking of taking a silent retreat together. As much as possible, try not to be together in the same location.

You must create time for yourself and make sure you are not distracted by your partner or tempted to communicate with them.

If these boundaries are maintained, you can be present with the self while also sharing the experience 

You can respect the individual journey while on the retreat but speak and journal about it as a couple afterward.

Silent Retreat in Malaysia

Kek Lok Si Temple Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Kek Lok Si Temple, Penang, Malaysia

Malaysia is a multicultural and diverse country where various religions and non-religious spiritual beliefs co-exist.

Finding a meditation retreat proved difficult as many centers are booked ahead of time. After looking at our travel plans, we found availability in Malaysia at the Vipassana Center in Penang Hill East overlooking Georgetown.

To guarantee our spots, we booked our attendance three months in advance. All Vipassana centers are free to attend with a suggested donation given upon completion of the course. 

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Where To Take a Silent Retreat

If you are curious about taking a silent meditation retreat, you’ll find centers all over the world. Here are a few worth considering.

Silent Reatreat in USA

Art of Living Retreat Center by Authentic Food Quest
A beautiful place for your meditation journey – Photo credit: Art of Living Facebook page

Silent in Europe

Nâm Silence Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Choose your silent retreat Photo credit: Asharum Amonines Facebook page

Belgium

France 

Spain

Masia Escrigas How To Prepare For A Silent Retreat by Authentic Food Quest
Seated meditation – Photo credit: Masia Eescrigas Facebook page

Portugal

UK

Silent Retreat in Asia & Oceania

Retreat Bali by Authentic Food Quest
Recharge with meditations – Photo credit: The Yogi’s Garden Bali Facebook page

Indonesia

India

Anahata Yoga Retreat How To Prepare For A Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
A residential eco-­yoga retreat – Photo credit: Anahata Yoga Retreat Facebook page

New Zealand

Keeping Up With the Practice

To help deepen the Vipassana meditation practice, it is encouraged, whenever possible, to attend weekly group sittings with other Vipassana meditators

As such, we made it a point to find other sittings on our travels. Not all experiences were the same, but they are all based on the same principles.

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Group sittings – One Day Meditation Practice in Bangkok, Thailand

Entrance Bangkok Center Silent Retreat Authentic Food Quest
Entrance at Bangkok Meditation Center

Thailand was our next destination after Malaysia, and our first group sitting after the silent retreat was in Bangkok.

 it was dramatically different from our experience in Malaysia.

The biggest surprise was the overt influence of Buddhism which went against the no “religious or sect” principles of Vipassana meditation.

Instead of only sitting meditations, we learned about “walking meditation”. This is where you lift, step, and put down your feet in a very deliberate and contemplative manner.

Chicago and Fort Lauderdale

Inside the meditation room by Authentic Food Quest
The meditation room

Back in the United States from Southeast Asia, we attended two different group sittings.

In Chicago, the sitting was short. And it was followed by a discussion after a short reading. 

In Fort Lauderdale, the sitting took place in the home of an individual. This practice was similar to our experience in Malaysia, and we enjoyed it very much.

Group sittings – Over a Weekend in Chicago

Group sittings can also take place over multiple days but in less than 10 days. 

In Chicago, we attended a weekend group sitting meditation based on Vipassana principles. There was no overnight stay at the weekend retreat. And you need to bring your own vegetarian food.

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In Summary

Is a 10-day Vipassana Retreat Right for You? The Vipassana experience is a personal one. And it is different for everyone. Everyone can benefit from meditation. 

While 10-day silent meditation retreats can be demanding and difficult in many ways, they are ultimately doable.

Vipassana is just one type of meditation practice. While we found it to be extremely beneficial, what’s most important is that you develop your own personal practice. 

Vipassana and meditation, in general, give you insight into your mind and life. That awareness cannot be understated. Everyone must find their own path to living a joyful and fulfilling life.

 In the words of S.N. Goenka, “May all beings find real peace, real harmony, real happiness.”

Have you taken or considered taking a silent meditation retreat? Please let us know in the comments below.

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24 Comments on “How To Best Prepare For Your First Silent Retreat (Personal Experiences)”

  1. What an incredible experience! I always look forward to reading about all of your wonderful experiences around the world. I think the 10-day retreat would be pretty hard for me, but I definitely like the idea of powering down the electronics for 10 days!!! Maybe that should be my New Year’s resolution! Thanks for sharing, and I look forward to your next article!

    Reply
    • Thanks Lyle, disconnecting was definitively one of the best parts of the experience. Taking the time to go within and be with oneself was the greatest gift we gave ourselves. It’s not easy, not it’s not impossible either. One just needs to be ready 🙂 Thanks for stopping by and more articles coming soon. Cheers 🙂

      Reply
  2. Very interesting read. I can definitely see the benefits of a silent retreat (for myself), but maybe this post can inspire me to at least start practicing to stay still and quiet for a short time and build up my tolerance. I’d truly love to give this a try, but 10 days is a long time. Especially for a newbie. I think I can also relate to those little aches and pains being slightly related to emotional baggage. That makes total sense.

    Reply
    • Thanks Vanessa for your feedback. Indeed, it takes time to build up the practice. We actually never thought we could do one hour of meditation, let alone 11 hours per day. We took a chance at the retreat and it was life changing. If you ever consider going to a 10 day silent meditation retreat in the future and have questions, feel free to ask. Cheers 🙂

      Reply
  3. This totally wouldn’t be my thing and I doubt I could sit still doing nothing but meditating for 10 hours a day for 10 days. The 4am wake-up would be enough to send me over the edge – I’m a total night owl. But it sure was fascinating to read about. Thanks for sharing your experience!

    Reply
  4. Thanks for this article: it took my right back to my Vipassana 10 day silent retreat in 1990.
    It was a torturous, exhausting, life-changing and somehow beautiful experience.
    I haven’t wanted to repeat it, but I’ve had a lot of experiences like that in my life.

    Reply
    • Wow, in 1990…that’s incredible. Where did you take your Vipassana retreat? You are right, it is difficult on many levels and very powerful and enriching. I would actually be open to taking another course again in the near future.

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  5. I remember when I attend the meditation in Bangkok. It was my first time and I have to admit it was so hard not to talk and meditate for few hours. I almost fell asleep. most of the time. I can’t imagine myself doing this for 10 days. Wow! You guys are amazing! it will take a lot of motivation to walk away from the modern world and meditate for 10days. I salute you and thank your for sharing your experience 😉

    Reply
    • Fighting sleep, Cai is one of the most difficult aspects, especially at 4:30 am. I have to admit, I fell asleep more times than I can remember. Taking a break from the constant connection and technology was actually easy and great. I really felt like I could relax from within…and that felt great. When was your experience in Bangkok?

      Reply
  6. To be honest, I don’t think I could make it through this retreat. I value communication too much. Having said that, it does look like a great place, and I know some people who would absolutely benefit from such a retreat. I know I had a lot of friends going for them when I was in SE Asia and they really liked the result. Some even wanted to stay for more than 10 days.

    Reply
    • Another way to look at “communication” is to think about it as communication with yourself and within yourself. You get to hear loudly and clearly all the voices in your head. Glad to hear that your friends have liked the results. I’m not sure I’d go for more than 10 days 🙂 Though the experience itself was worth well worth it!

      Reply
  7. Really interesting, thanks for sharing your experience guys! Vipassana meditation retreat in Malaysia sounds like it would be difficult to start out with, I’m not one who is known to be able to sit still! But I stopped at your question about when do you ever really get 10 days to truly connect with yourself. I’m glad to hear that it gets easier over time, and you settle into the routine. A very interesting way to approach meditation; it sounds like you both got a lot out of the retreat – very good tip to keep a journal handy to record the experience as soon as you get out. Something I might consider in the future. Thanks for sharing your experience!

    Reply
    • You are most welcome Meg, and so glad you enjoyed reading about the experience. The experience was challenging on many levels, but also incredibly powerful and enriching. You do get used to the schedule and it quickly becomes a habit. Something worth exploring if you are interested 🙂

      Reply
  8. I like to meditate and practice it daily, but I’m not sure if I could do it all day for ten days! You experience sounds very interesting and I’m sure you felt better for it. I don’t think I could be silent all day either!

    Reply
    • It does take some adjustments Lucy, but it is doable 🙂 As a regular meditator, you would actually find it easier than those who do not meditate daily. The 10 days is a long time, but at the same time, very short as well. If you are interested in deepening your meditation practice, don’t hesitate to explore Vipassana.

      Reply
  9. I really enjoyed reading this, and commend you both for giving a silent meditation for 10 days(!) a try. It would definitely be a personal journey for sure, I would be one of those weird people that would like noodles at 6:30 am!

    Reply
    • Wonderful to meet another a early morning noodle lover. What’s interesting is that the morning noodles are not too spicy. They are tasty and easy to eat in the morning. Glad you enjoyed reading the article and let us know if you ever have any questions about taking a silent retreat.

      Reply
  10. I have a friend who also did this 10 day silent retreat and I felt so amazed. Isn’t it amazing? Now while reading your post I’m super glad you made it because I couldn’t believe myself that I can. lol It also reminded me of how our half day meditation course in Bangkok failed, actually, your photo above is the same as me and my friend went! So until now, we haven’t gone back there again together, we just shake our heads everytime we remember it!
    Penang is such a great city, I’ve been there once but didn’t actually know they offer this course. You are so sweet as a couple that this made you closer together and you both enjoyed the same activity, also gave you a full space on your own without any distractions.

    Reply
    • That’s interesting Cathy, that you had a similar experience in Bangkok. It is worth seeking out a credible center to get the full experience. Going on the meditation retreat as a couple was quite powerful. There was a also a mother -daughter who seemed to enjoy it together as well. The next time you are in Penang, do not hesitate to take the course. You can be assured that the food will be good 🙂

      Reply
  11. I could almost feel the peaceful atmosphere while reading this! I hear more and more of such experiences with meditation, with people saying it totally changed their life and how they see everything around them, I find it really interesting and I would be quite tempted to try. I still find courageous to go for a 10-day experience without really knowing what to expect! Oh and the food you described sounded really yummy!

    Reply
    • Thanks Julien. Taking the break and going within has been a truly transformational experience. If you are interested in self-discovery, it is worth the experience. The food was our greatest concern, but fortunately, it turned out to be just fine and surprisingly delicious. Glad you enjoyed the article and daily meditation is a good place to begin. Let us know if have additional questions 🙂

      Reply
  12. I can imagine what an amazing experience the Vipassana meditation retreat was for both of you. I don’t think I could do it. And I’m impressed that you are looking to continue – it clearly had powerful results

    Reply

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